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Shoes: Primark, old. Alternative one here.
Socks: ASOS, old. Alternative one here.
Photographer: Connull Drummond
That is the question on my mind… how is bravery defined? Is being brave something that can be defined with in a blog post? Can you be brave when your scared all the time?
I have my own definition of bravery… and that has changed several times throughout the years.
When I was younger bravery was loud, dramatic gestures – like running into a burning building to save someone. Or jumping into a lake to save a puppy.
These are all grand gesture of bravery… for sure. But there are smaller acts that are specific to yourself that can be just as brave.
I feel bravery is doing something that scares you shitlesss… and persevere.
Why…. do you ask?
Or do you just get me, get where I am coming from? Understand my hap-hazard, scatterbrained, all-over-the place logic?
Don’t worry if you don’t, sometimes even I don’t.
By that I mean my mind goes 100 miles an hour, so many thoughts go over and over in my brain. Sometimes I can not pin them down. Or I forget them… and get annoyed when I can not remember what I was thinking about before.
However, I digress.
This whole tangent of thought occurred because of an incident at work, if you watch my instagram stories I touch on this the other day.
Basically I attempted to ask for peoples thoughts on what I should write about. I was unsure on the topic, but then I remembered my thoughts on this incident and made my mind up myself and just decided on the topic; bravery.
The incident in question happened due to JK having to leave work early.
I don’t want to go in to too much detail, unfortunately, not because I don’t want to share but because its not my full story to tell. It isn’t my place to share someone else’s story without their consent.
JK had an anxiety attack at work, ended up feeling really ill and sick. Then had to go home. (That is facts, I don’t want to go into further detail. But that is bullet points of what took place the other day.)
The fact he managed to make it into work during the week whilst battling his anxiety and dealing with his dyslexia on top of everything else just … well…. makes me feel proud of him.
I say proud, because I know how frustrated he is that he is struggling so much. I have dyslexia as well, I know how hard it can be to work on computers, dealing with different systems, whilst handling data AND on top of that talking to people at the same time whilst trying to stop the letters and numbers from juggling all over the place.
Trust me, it isn’t easy.
I’ve been lucky that I’ve adjusted myself to that with starting my blog, I am regularly on my laptop typing up posts, researching or reading other posts/articles/journals to keep myself engaged.
But see if I didn’t take up blogging, if I didn’t have a job or lifestyle where I was on a laptop and using different systems then, no word of a lie I would be mega struggling right now.
I’ve just been fortunate that I’ve had the transferrable skills that I have.
But to turn up to work when your feeling like shit, is that really being brave? When your battling your own mind, your own anxiety, combined with facing the tiring daily grind… yes, yes it is.
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To me that is bravery.
Cause that is something that you need to go that extra mile for everyday, just to make it onto the same level as someone else. And that is brave.
Doing something that takes that extra energy from you can be so, so tiring. And runs the risk of you falling into a pit of self pity, which I do end up doing every now and then when I am feeling proper down.
Thats also fine. Just don’t let yourself stay there, I hate it when I get into these periods of self pitying and I just want to climb my way out of it.
Anyways back to the point;
Being so scared about doing something but doing it anyways. We all know that we need to work, we all know that going to work is a bare necessity of life.
But doing it whilst being scared is another kettle of fish all together.
I think the main reason why I think this way is because I am scared of a lot of things.
I remember I used to feel sick going into my old work, like actually sick. I would even cry the night before when I knew I hard work the next day.
Does that mean I am oversensitive? Potentially, but what it definitely shows is that I was brave to go into work, and push myself.
I have always been a hard worker. I have slacked off in my time, anyone that says they haven’t just can not be telling the truth. Of course I have, I’ve seen so many folk slack off in my work lifetime. I notice its always the ‘favourites’ that can slack without getting into trouble while others? Well that is definitely a different matter. ..
Ah sorry I’ve went on a tangent again!
JK goes into work every day even when he is in pain, stressed or scared. He still goes in and does his job and that is something that I feel is very, very brave.
I’ve read a few articles on being brave, or defining bravery and they are all different. But what they all agree on is that being brave is situational and its dependant on the person and what is involved to warrant the descriptive word of being brave.
Another example is of being quiet and taking in what is happening and being brave enough to let another talk.
Everyone has their own version of being brave.
And that is so important.
I don’t know if your anything like me, then you find it hard to get proud of yourself, or what you’ve done.
So when am feeling down I like to think of the little things that make me feel strong. By ‘little’ I don’t mean insignificant just wee acts of bravery that is unique to yourself and your situation. I like to go over them in my mind when I am having moments of doubt or insecurity or fear.
I remember all the mini and big hurdles I’ve had to overcome to get to this point.
Even though I was scared, even though I was down, I made it.
I think for me, and you, and for everyone that doubts themselves. Or feels scared. Or gets anxious. You all should do this. List at least three mini or major acts of bravery that you’ve done even though you were scared.
And whenever your having those moments of doubt just remember you’ve been brave before, you can do it again.
You are brave.
You are strong.
Thanks for reading lovelies
Articles I read for this: